HIs Heartbeat, Her Pulse.

Dear Abba,
One too many compromises later,
my life is unattractive.
I’m constantly walking in defeat,
and living below Your standards.
How can you love me still?

Dear Child,
I love you unconditionally,
My trip to Calvary covered it all.
I wish you could see yourself through my eyes,
then you would know that I see My Son when I look at you.

Dear Abba,
My hormones are raging
and everything in me is screaming gratification,
I never thought I would be on this page again,
In a different journal with yet another male specimen.
How was I to know
that time spent in the back of a car with a preacher was not a sermon.

Dear Child,
the nagging feeling at the back of your mind
was my way of telling you to wait.
You wanted to, but you were not firm
You have to learn to mean what you say
Just like I taught you to.

Dear Abba,
I’m such an emotional wreck inside
Like pieces of a porcelain doll
carefully glued together
I wear masks,
of different shapes and shades
Whatever suits my audience

Dear Child,
forgive yourself, and forgive him
Just like I forgave you,
the alternative is a downward spiral to perdition
You do not want to be the reason why people look back at Sodom
Look upon Calvary and draw your strength
You are stronger than you think

Dear Abba,
what if I fail?
What if I’m not strong enough?
What if I’m a weakling?

Dear Child,
before you were formed in your mother’s womb, I knew you
I chose you before the foundations of the world
I knew you then, and I chose to love you
Keep your heart in sync with Mine
Until you become the masterpiece I already see

Dear Abba,
sometimes I think your expectations of me are too high
Your standards too lofty to truly attain
How did Your Son do it?
How did He keep Himself unblemished from the world?
How did he resist the allure of this world?

Dear Child,
trust me to keep you from falling,
Know that my grace is sufficient for you
Abide in me, and I will abide in you
My yoke is easy and my burden is light

Dear Abba,
Your love is never-ending, overwhelming
It overflows the river banks
Its depth Is unfathomable
Its height immeasurable
I long to know it and fully understand the depths of it
Show me.

Dear Child,
I gave My Son in exchange for your life
So that you could stand before Me with confidence
Where you’ll see with perfect clarity,
The depth of My love for you.

(c) Olamide Oti, 2015

“Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
Hebrews 4:14-16

11 Comments Add yours

  1. pelumi says:

    Those words were Real! Something I could relate with…beautifully crafted heart transactions!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Now this is awesome. God’s heart keeps on going out for us, encouraging us, rooting for us, no matter what. I love the dialogue. Had me going ”Wow…just, wow…” 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Olamide says:

      Always! Thank you Emmanuel.


  3. Ah Lamide! No words! This was too real and a thousand several shades of beautifully pictured unconditional love in its ultimate form.
    For praying aloud, the struggles in the deepest recesses of our heart and reminding us of the kind of father we’ve been privileged and predestined to have, bless your heart!


    1. Olamide says:

      Hi Liz! I’m glad the words spoke to you…for the glory of the One whose words are ever true.


  4. Ope says:

    Real…the 2nd letter to God, I can perfectly relate. Good piece..I see myself in the discussion, what we can be afraid of, what we don’t have to be afraid of ever… an intercessor we have.


    1. Olamide says:

      Glad it blessed you. Thanks for reading.


  5. Luke Ogar says:

    Deeply inspiring!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Omoteniola says:

    5 years later, still as powerful, still as relevant.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Olamide says:

      Wow! Thank you for reading again! I’m glad!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.